if only,,

an afternoon walk

to pass a bearded man with

a cap and a black concert T with white lettering,

standing

looking at his cellphone.

i look back not to see his 

face but his

cigarette and his hands -

not sure why

the smell made me smile,

the cigarette I could draw,

the hand was kind

almost turned around and spoke...

i had a feeling I knew

him...

logically I kept walking..

I stopped to swing...waiting to see if

he would walk by me

a sadness came as I

swang and he kept walking.

outer spaces

across the line
into a crowd to
only see the
crack in the sidewalk

hopping, skipping, running
out of the ring
finding another crack

running in the road
there is less traffic
alone made more
sense

outer spaces brought
me back to the house,
but not really home.

ME !

you think you know
but you dont
i dont know so how
do you

a surprise when i smile
a surprise when i laugh
a surprise when my eyes light up

even for me..
nothing is planned
nothing is fake

i am either here or
i am not...there is no guessing
there.